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Sunday, August 5th, 2007
2:30 pm
If anyone ever feels like chatting in interactive real time, check out IMVU messenger (I've been fucking around with it lately)... Drop me a line to let me know if you want to and when.  I'll have some free time until the end of August.

Peace Out.

1 attempt - Catch me if you Can

Sunday, July 29th, 2007
2:11 pm

- vent -

I Just finished reading King's The Stand and, boy, how I wished I had never started.  Don't get me wrong -- It's a post-apocalyptic masterpiece in every respect, but for someone with chronic depression (among other things) it's an emotional nightmare waiting to happen.  You invest a mindfucking amount of time and emotion into the plot and the characters and then--KABANG!--he fucking kills the vast majority of them at the end of the book.  I don't need that.  I mean, yes, how pitiful am I to be chronically depressed over the deaths of fictional characters? Pretty damn pitiful.  But that's the reason why I stopped reading fiction years ago -- I figured I'd give it another shot over the summer.  What a damn foolish move, if you ask me.

That's it.  I'm writing off fiction, any and all of it.  My life sucks enough as it is.  And now I have to fucking fill the despairing void I've created.  What a pathetic excuse for a human being am I.

- /vent - 

4 attempts - Catch me if you Can

Wednesday, February 21st, 2007
12:36 am - update --

All right, so an update on my life (or at least the last week)...

I've been inundated by schoolwork, to be honest, simply drowning in my schedule.  When I'm not in classes, I'm at work.  When I'm not at work, I'm studying.  When I'm not studying, I'm falling asleep somewhere -- park bench, library desk, bus stop, grocery store...

My shrink wants me to get observed overnight at a sleep clinic, because he thinks I have a sleep disorder (on top of everything else).  I'm putting that off.  He also prescribed me sleeping pills.  I'm not taking them.  I hate trying a new prescription because bad shit always ends up happening -- side effects and new emotional responses, etc.  I don't have the time, patience, or energy to deal with that right now, so I'm procrastinating as long as possible.

I need to graduate and be done with all of this jumping-through-the-hoops bullshit.  It's simply not worth my time anymore.  I need a life, a real life, one that *I* choose.  But, alas, another extra year of hell awaits...

Okay, I don't have much else to say.  I really wish I had time to update my website/journal, but I don't right now.  Maybe I will soon.  Maybe not.  Who knows?  I'm way too tired to care at this point.

Until next time.

 



current mood: lonely

2 attempts - Catch me if you Can

Thursday, February 15th, 2007
1:53 pm
Has it really been four years since last I've written here, in the vast expanse of the LiveJournal desert?

It has been, undoubtedly, two years since last my fingers caressed the keyboard, my words posted on any journal for others to bother read.  What is the point?  Where is the explanation?  I've none.  Think me eternally a shadow that I might linger for a while, when all least expect.

What has preoccupied my life these last years?  I live in new places, own new things, know new individuals... But it matters not.  My life, my life --- as empty as it always had been.  What sinister device has hollowed my soul?

Ah, but here I am!  I wonder if it matters at all.  I doubt.  My words -- nothing in the enduring emptiness. What is left is dust.

current mood: melancholy

4 attempts - Catch me if you Can

Saturday, November 29th, 2003
2:16 am
This journal has moved.

E-mail me if you care.
If you don't, you shouldn't even be here, now should you?
Monday, August 18th, 2003
1:48 am
-friends only- journal

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